Time heals?

I was asking my female patient if she enjoyed her Christmas celebrations when she started to tear up.

"I don't like this time of year" she said, "the last time my father spoke to me was on Christmas and then he died two days later."

"I'm sorry to here that, how many years has it been since his passing?" (I asked this thinking that the death had been recent because of her emotional reaction)

"Oh... in '52"

Flirting

In the elevator at work I overheard an eighty something year old gentleman in a wheelchair tell a ninety-six year old lady: "You have a beautiful face."   So cute.

When life gives you lemons....

...use them. Several years ago I heard a lecture by a geriatric psychiatrist on non-pharmacological methods of calming elderly patients.  She stated that the scent of lemon had been found to have an effect in soothing the distresses of the older population. Her recommendation was to regularly spray the lemon-scent as a type of air freshener to keep those in the vicinity mellow. Though I never acted on this advice, it has held a place in my mind.  Recently I have begun to drink the juice of a squeezed lemon mixed with warm water and a bit of honey each evening before bed. The results have been incredible. Never before have I been so relaxed and stress-free in the evening. High in vitamin C, this drink is popular for those with sore throats, but consider it for its alternative use. Now, I'm off to find a lemon-scented air freshener because who actually likes to de-escalate angry/aggressive patients.

Learning How to Die

I'm gonna miss you.
I'm gonna miss you when you're gone.

She says, "I love you, I'm gonna miss you in your songs."

And I said, "Please don't talk about the end, don't talk about how every living thing goes away."

She said, "Friend....all along I thought I was learning how to take, how to bend not how to break, how to live not how to cry. Really, I've been learning how to die, been learning how to die."

Hey everyone...I got nowhere to go.
The grave is lazy, he takes our body slow

I've been learning how to die.

Learning how to Die by Jon Foreman

A Christmas Passing

She was dying. At fifty-five lung cancer invaded her life. Unbeknownst to her the insidious growth had metastasised throughout her body. Though the doctors were kind, their eloquent words did not disguise the harsh reality of her situation. Nothing more can be done to save you. She left the metropolis and returned to her home, a small town of fifteen hundred souls, where we recived her into our care. It was just days before Christmas. A steady stream of visitors frequented her room in the ensuing days. Friends, and what little family she had, came to pay their last respects as the time slipped by. The nurses did not have much regard for her life partner. His visits were sporadic and very brief during which his treatment of our patient was less than kind. He seemed too wrapped up in himself. His own life and suffering consumed him and he did not offer any comfort to the one he had committed his life to. Her decline was steady and all could see that the end was close at hand. Christmas day dawned as a cold, dark winter day. The hours ticked by and no one came to sit with our young patient. Had they forgotten her? Given up? Were they too focused on their celebrations of the holiday to offer comfort to one in turmoil? The nurses checked in on the patient often to prevent the pain from becoming unbearable. She suffered from brain mets and was at times confused. We were not entirely sure that she had constant awareness of what was to occur. Finally, all alone in the greyness of the afternoon, she slipped away. Is this what Christmas is? Do we so insulate ourselves from the dark part of life, the suffering and death of others, and focus on the light, joy, and happiness for ourselves? Are we so selfish that we cannot allow any interruption to our happy holidays? I certainly hope not. To me, Christmas is about loving others...a love that can be so painful at times.

No more Florida?

At work today I was assisting this sweet elderly lady who has dementia. Attempting to engage her in conversation I mentioned that Christmas was in just a few days. She didn't have much of a reaction to this news. To help orientate her I said "it's Dec.20th today and you would never believe it looking outside, it's such a gorgeous sunny day." And it was. Though somewhat on the colder side, the day was brilliantly lit by the rays of a nearly winter sun.  I continued, "I can't imagine having Christmas when it's so sunny outside" (usually weather is quite miserable around here for the holidays). My patient still gave no indication that she was following the conversation. "Mind you," I said, "it's usually sunny in Florida and they seem to manage Christmas just fine." My patient finally roused herself to speak and quite definitively said, "Florida? Florida is disappearing." .....okkkayy then. I won't argue.

Hello World!

...and so I begin to write, though for what purpose I do not entirely know. Perhaps a desire to undertake a new project and change the world, or it could be that boredom simply propels me. My hope is that through this new adventure I might broaden horizons (both yours and mine). I have always wanted to compose grandiose scripts with my words but until now have never made any significant effort. Wherever my bumbling attempt takes me, I hope to be better for having tried.